A Chat on Weight Gain
I had my yearly physical at the doctor’s the other day and forget to ask for a blind weight test. I freaked out when I heard the number being read off the scale and had a very long cry sesh afterwards.
The last time I was weighed and saw the results was several years ago and the number was significantly less.
I know that my body has changed in recovery and now that I’ve entered my 20s. I’ve gained back weight I needed to gain for overall health purposes and I have a much happier relationship with food and my body now. But some days it’s still really hard to cope with these changes and fight off the critical voice in my head.
This emotional, downward spiral moment made me feel like all of the work I’ve done in recovery was wiped away and I right back at square one.
But then I looked through the list of comfort quotes I have saved to my phone (highly recommend you try this) and found the one on the last slide below. “…Healing is messy. And there’s no timeline for healing.”
This quote always reminds me that recovery won’t look linear, and that majority of things in life are not linear. Which can make life feel pretty sh*tty sometimes. But rather than get frustrated over these occurrences, I now try to think of them as life’s way of helping us reinforce new mindsets every time a trigger presents itself, which allows more and more growth and healing to take place.
So rather than beat myself up over this breakdown like I would’ve in the past, I instead chose to be kinder to myself and say:
“It’s okay if you thought you’ve fully healed, or mostly healed, and then have these moments where you get triggered and fall apart. It’s okay to not be where you thought you were or should be or where you want to be. Even if you’re not all the way along the path yet, you’ve still made so much progress from where you started. And that's so incredible! Give yourself grace and take it moment by moment. You’re gonna be okay :)”
x Emma